We are the Croods, and it's time we accept that

Like most people, I am angry. I’m angry about a lot of things, all of them very important, but the most important thing that is making me the most angry right now is the utter disrespect being shown by the Australian public after the prime minister Scott Morrison declared that the nation’s current situation regarding the pandemic is akin to that faced by the titular family in the classic Dreamworks dramedy “The Croods”.

Not, I should stress, that I am agitated about disrespect towards our prime minister. As far as I’m concerned no Australian prime minister has ever been disrespected enough, and Scott Morrison could do with as much disrespect as possible.

No, I’m furious because despite his general disrespectability, on this occasion Scott Morrison actually hit upon the PERFECT analogy to describe our state of being in COVID times, and everyone, from pundits to wags, has been showing savage and deplorable disrespect for The Croods, and for the powerful lessons they have to teach us.

What is it that these chattering ninnies object to? Easily-digestible metaphors? The rendering of complex issues into comprehensible terms? The use of pop culture references to engage greater numbers on subjects of massive public import? Superb animation and skilled voice acting?

Let us be clear: here in Australia, in August 2021, we ARE the Croods. Specifically, we are the Croods during the first half of the original film (the more recent “The Croods 2: A New Age” also has much to teach us, but on different subjects), when a battle of wills is taking place regarding the direction the Croods should take in future.

We are huddling, as the Croods did, in a cave, but not a literal cave: this is cave made of the novel coronavirus and the harsh lockdown restrictions imposed by governments in response to same. Maybe the cretinous mockery of Morrison’s metaphor is due to the public not understanding this point: it’s not a LITERAL cave. We are not ACTUALLY prehistoric members of the homo genus but indeterminate species. Understand, we are speaking FIGURATIVELY, for god’s sake.

The point is this: like the Croods, we know that the cave affords us safety, and we know that the world outside the cave is full of danger. Moreover, we know that to venture far from our cave will expose us to perils the nature of which we are not yet fully aware. To leave our cave would be a scary undertaking.

And like Grug (Nicolas Cage), the caring yet inflexible patriarch of the Crood clan, there are those who wish to place safety above all else. Grug insists we must remain in the cave, lest the terrors of the outside world consume us. In this he is motivated by love for his family, but his narrow outlook does not allow him to consider all the relevant factors.

For, like Eep (Emma Stone), the headstrong but courageous eldest Crood daughter, there are those of us who know that safety is not the only thing in life. Eep wishes to know what life is like outside the cave, to experience the world in all its wonder and excitement and - yes, sometimes - danger. Eep recognises that though living life to the fullest is not always entirely safe, it is far preferable to simply “existing” in a state of joyless security.

And so, as Scott Morrison pointed out, Australia now faces a choice. Do we listen to the Grugs, or to the Eeps? Do we place safety at any cost ahead of all other considerations, or do we accept the risks inherent in the wider world as the price we pay for a life well-lived? Do we, in short, stay in the cave, or go out into the world?

The film makes it clear that the Croods, by eventually leaving the cave and experiencing the world in all its beauty and terror, make the right choice. But perhaps some watch the Croods and are disgusted by their recklessness. Some may wish that Grug had stuck to his guns. It is between those viewers, and the ones who are grateful that Grug in the end came around to Eep’s way of thinking, and learned to embrace the new ideas of Guy (Ryan Reynolds) for a better future.

This is the discussion we have to have, as a nation and as a society. But to have this discussion, we must first acknowledge that the medium of the Croods is the perfect way in which to make the debate easily accessible to the Australian people, and that by introducing the Croods to the discourse, Scott Morrison has performed the most valuable service of his political career.